We’re getting some bloody big spiders in the house at the moment. It seems they’re called (quite aptly) ‘Giant House Spiders’ and while they might not be tarantula-size, they’re big enough to make me swear if one unexpectedly runs towards me. It seems they’re a newish species, and they’re actually good for the house because they keep more undesirable spiders and infection carrying bugs out of the house by eating them (haven’t seen the cat for a while either).

Being the biggest chap in the house it’s my duty to chuck them out when they scare my wife. My 18 month old son could probably do a better job – because he eats them back – at least we think he does – we recently found him in the garden munching happily away with half a slug in his  hand, but my wife insists I get rid of the spiders. I tried to corner one with a pint glass but (ready for this?) it’s legs wouldn’t fit in the top of the glass!

No joke – I’m told they come inside when the weather gets a little colder looking for mates.

Anyway they didn’t have them this size when I was a kid for sure.

But a lot has changed since then.

And in a good way – take gurus – these days you have to actually listen to what people have to say rather than be BSed by big cars and well cut suits for one thing.

A friend of mine recently showed a scruffy looking individual around his business who also smelt a little of booze.

He didn’t really take him seriously and thought he wass wasting his time until he discovered the bloke was in fact a very wealthy businessman. Itr’s the same old thing – if you’re poor and weird you’ve got mental problems but if you’re rich and weird you’re eccentric.

And some of the people I admire and have learned most for drive old cars, look scruffy but are sharp as knives and extremely wealthy.

And I think it’s because they don’t have to impress anyone. Would anyone actually drive a porshe if they were the last person on the planet or would you potter around in a big, comfortable old heap of a car? I’m not sure myself about that one but it’s an interesting thought.

And money gives you the freedom to behave, dress, live, eat, drink or whatever in exactly the manner you want – without answering to anyone.

This is why I don’t respond well to those gurus who show pictures of their yachts, their ferraris and their big houses because they’re pretty much compensating for little dicks. But you show me someone who has built a business because they want to spend the rest of their life sailing around the world, or walking in the Himalayas without having to worry about money then I’m a buyer every time.

The difference?

The first lot – the phallicallly disadvantaged lot with the flashy cars etc are doing it all for other people.

The second lot – the weirdos who want to scruff around travelling through South American for 10 years without a financial care in the world are the people who are doing it for themselves.

Now if your dream is to become financially independent so you can run a fleet of vintage Jaguars then that’s great – then you belong to the second category, but if you have to own a Jaguar to demonstrate to people that you are successful then I think you’re doing it for the wrong reasons.

If you work on your business for yourself then you’ve much more chance of success than if you’re trying to live up to other people’s expectations.

So choose your role models well.

Why do you want to be an internet marketer? Do you want to be rich? If so do you want to be rich so you can feel better than other people or because it would allow you to live live on your own terms?

Turning up at school reunions in a big car with a supermodel girlfriend stops being fun after fifty or sixty years (joke – you know what I mean), but there’s nothing anywhere can beat the buzz of ticking off your list a dream that you’ve had since childhood.

We’ve ticked off little things like spending New Year’s eve standing with 200,000 other happy people on the Champs Elysees in Paris watching the fireworks above the Arc D’Triumph and big things like being at home every single day with our kids.

And the people I’ve learnt most from are the ones with the simple dreams, the funny dreams, the ones who are their own person.

So when you choose your guru it’s not just about the information, it’s about why they’re doing it too I think. If someone’s motivation is a driving, personal ambition they’re much more likely to find a way to acheive the goal and then they can pass on that info to you.

Makes you think…

I have to go – something big and hairy just walked out from under the fireplace – and it wasn’t my sister.

•